FAMILY, 1: THE CHURCH

Mark 6:7-10 – ⁷Calling the Twelve to him, he sent them out two by two and gave them authority over evil spirits. ⁸These were his instructions: “Take nothing for the journey except a staff—no bread, no bag, no money in your belts. ⁹Wear sandals but not an extra tunic. ¹⁰Whenever you enter a house, stay there until you leave that town.

The church family and the believer’s family are vitally important for a wholesome life. This family article gives attention to church relationships.

Civil government is rightfully concerned about street gangs but why do young people find them alluring? Could the loose association in home and church have anything to do with it? Even though done through intimidation and fear street gangs do a better job of gaining commitment from members than either home or church.

            Fifteen year old Keith Smith wanted to drop out of his street gang. The youth, a pastor’s son, decided he no longer wanted to take that route to being cool and popular, wearing colors forbidden to others and his cap tilted to the side. So he and his fellow gang members agreed on a freedom pact: Smith could become neutral if he accepted punishment from each gang member. Smith went to a park to meet six members of his gang and accept his punishment, authorities say. Police said Smith was punched and kicked over and over again, beaten so badly that he was knocked unconscious and his face disfigured. Smith now lies in a coma…. What lured Smith, who was not a dropout or the product of poverty or a troubled family, to join a street gang? Just as disturbing is the question of how a youth extracts himself from a group bent on intimidation and fear…. “Keith is a good kid,” said his father, Charles, during a telephone interview. “He drinks no booze and smokes no cigarettes. What happened? I don’t know.” So why did Smith join a gang?  Those who know him say he was a loner and just wanted some excitement. He was only a peripheral gang member, not hard-core. He did not go around stealing, selling drugs or killing. So why was he nearly beaten to death? Gangs are making it more difficult for members to defect. “It’s not like joining a club. You stop paying dues and you say, ‘I can get out.’ If they find out you told on anybody in the gang, the whole gang comes after you. It’s a penitentiary mentality.” (Chicago Tribune)

            Street gangs flourish because of one underlying truth: The human nature is designed to sense worth by what a person believes in and commits to. Our society needs to see believers homestead for Jesus and lay claim to His community.

Is the indictment true that church people are nothing more than “sprinkling” members? Are they mostly coming to church for three sprinklings – water, rice, dirt? Pastors have increasingly become instruments of baptisms, marriages and burials. Churches are becoming an institution for hatching, matching and dispatching.

Through a mutual bond in Christ, the church seeks to advance the development of meaningful relationships and lasting friendships. Achieving this is an admirable challenge. The leadership team continually measures the balance between crowd and community; both must co-exist yet community should tip the scales. Many attending church choose to not get involved. Living in a culture promoting individuality and independence is partially at fault for creating this unhealthy mindset. The risk of involvement must rage war against social trends.

            Mark 6:10 records Jesus instructing His disciples to not be a house rover. One commentary wrote, “This direction was given to them, lest, if they did, they might appear to be fickle and restless; or lest they might hurt the feelings of those with whom they had first lodged.”

            Could this also be said of a church rover? Do they broadcast fickleness and restlessness? Are they offending people who faithfully attend a local church?

            A home church does three things for a person, similar to a biological family.

A home church gives people identity

I was raised in a home committed to embracing the value of the family name. My parents regularly gave instruction on what a Maddox could and could not do. The family name had standards and responsibilities, regardless the values of friends or society.

Although not church goers we were expected to act responsibly. Family standards were high. We were rarely swayed by the whims and ways of others. Our name had personal value, helping us to stand strong in a waffling society. Similar values, from a more faith-based perspective, were emphasized to my own children.

Benefits associated with family standards include courage for convictions. Strength and stamina becomes instilled, worth and integrity becomes rooted, and a drive to fulfill purpose becomes passed on to everyone in the home.

What does a lack of identity to a local church broadcast to people?

Some say, “I am a Christian.” In parts of Europe the term is synonymous with politics, Catholic or Protestant. There is little identity in saying, “I am a Christian.”

Some say, “I am born-again.” The phrase is expressed in a variety of settings.  A contemporary ballet includes, “When I look in your eyes I’m born again.” Many hardened law-breakers profess being born again. There is no clear meaning in the phrase.

Some say, “I am Evangelical or Pentecostal.” These titles narrow the field but the average person is not sure what they mean.

If a person says, “I am a member of [name] church,” they have identity. “You mean the church with terrific worship, where people discover answers to life’s challenges, the one with a strong emphasis on children, the one with committed young people?”

People gain identity by connecting with a faith community. The home church makes the follower of Jesus somebody.

A home church gives people stability

A local church stabilizes your appearance. How do you appear to others?

Consider the church rover: They are spiritual moochers, attending just for themselves. A church member is a spiritual investor.

A church rover is a perpetual guest. A church member is part of the family.

A church rover is get motivated. A church member is give motivated.

A church rover is a freeloader feeding on the kindnesses of others. A church member is a servant manifesting the grace of God.

A person appears less comely as a church rover.

The local church stabilizes your appetite. When our children lived at home, my wife developed a weekly and monthly menu. She made her meal selections based on cost, variety, nutritional value and balance. She was concerned for the care and wellbeing of her family. We often ate at home to insure a consistent and properly proportioned diet.

Our oldest daughter, while attending college, toured with a choir for a few weeks after the spring semester. In every city she lodged with a different family. Afterwards she came home and said, “Please, no fried chicken or cold cuts for the rest of the summer.” She had it with certain foods, some being unhealthy.

Church rovers become spiritual junk food junkies, going to the easiest, most convenient spiritual fast-food promoter, leading to a sluggish and imbalanced outlook on life. Church members receive a carefully balanced diet, gaining vigor and spiritual strength.

The local church stabilizes your acceptance. Church leaders regularly hear, “I’m lonely…I need a friend…I need fellowship…why aren’t people accepting me?” Others complain, “Why isn’t the church doing something about the problem of loneliness?”

A church can always do more to help those feeling alone and most churches are trying their very best, but could the problem be that lonely, friendless people have not stabilized themselves as part of the family?”

People often complain about cliques in the church. Know the difference between a clique and a cluster. Cliques are exclusive while clusters are inclusive. People normally cluster around others with similar interest, having things in common. The church needs lots of clusters.

During family trips our four children often paired up at events. For some activities the sisters and brothers paired up separately. At other times, the oldest sister and youngest brother paired up and the middle sister and brother paired up. This is how family behaves! Within the home different activities produce different interest. Nothing becomes jeopardized when the family clusters, it simply makes for more meaningful times together.

Church members should search for groups they find interesting, instead of roving to another church. Find those within the church with something in common.

Do you want to be accepted? Be committed to your church.

A home church gives people credibility.

This country is product-conscious. A brand name speaks quality, generic brands are perceived inferior. Most people do not prefer discount store televisions but something reputable from an exclusive dealer. Most people do not purchase dilapidated, unrecognizable used cars from Honest Joe’s Used Car Lot but quality vehicles from a brand-name dealer. When people seek a church, they look for earnest followers of Jesus rather than generic believers.

Many people do not like wearing a “tag.” They perceive membership as being exclusive instead of connected. Some refuse becoming members because of once being offended. There is always risk when getting involved. Get over it! You are hurting yourself and your spiritual formation.

A home church gives outlet for ministry, a major doorway to discovering purpose and fulfillment. Members of a local church gain greater ministry because membership indicates someone is responsible and accountable. Involvement in ministry, even beyond the local church, is connected to church affiliation. Opportunities happen when a believer is credible.

Get connected

To clearly identify with Jesus, to be spiritually developing and advancing, to have an effective and lasting impact on others, you need identity, stability and credibility. Without these traits there is minimal influence and little impact for Jesus.

            Are you looking for purpose? Are you looking for spiritual advancement? Are you looking for meaningful relationships? Are you passionate for ministry? These are directly connected to living for Jesus through a local church, the divinely created Spirit-filled community.

Jesus is coming back for His bride (the church). Give testimony you are part of His family and ready for His return.